Who is the man in the mirror? What purpose does a mirror serve you anyways? No! Not that mirror! Who cares if you have a pimple or a little scratch? Oh, you do. True. The girls care don't they? A handsome man is always a good thing isn't he?
Maybe I should define my mirror explicitly: my mirror shows you who you are on the inside. Inside. Inside what? Your heart? Your soul? Your spirit? Ah, my friend. Who are you? What difference do you make in this world? How many starving children do you feed? How many suicides do you prevent? How many people do you encourage? You don't know? No one? You don't care? Why should you? Ah, my friend. But it affects you don't you see? You still can't see? If you can't see it yet, then I'll let you learn it the hard way. Ah, ah, my friend.
Every action you take has an exponential effect on this clay world of ours. Even the little things you do in the "comfort" of your home. Look into the mirror and tell me, who are you? Tell me, tell yourself, or "karma" will show you your face, and you had better be ready to face your picture. Pulling a Dorian Gray is really not fun.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Saturday, January 26, 2008
It's a Saturday night
Does everyone drink? It's getting increasingly frustrating to see people live their lives thoughtlessly. A week ago, Jed my roommate, and I held sleep in disregard till the wee hours of the morning because we were "taking care" of a drunk freshman who stumbled through our open door with the frothy words, "Can I use your bathroom man?" (pronounced men). I sat with him in a single seat (and no, it wasn't that awkward; he was drunk man (pronounced men)) and I asked him if he wanted me to just pray randomly for him. Random? Sure!! I don't deny it!! I questioned my rationale in asking a very drunk person a serious question; and yes, I wondered if I was taking advantage of his situation. But I did it, and it was the right thing to do! This kid starts rambling about how much he loves Jesus. Confessions of a drunk man are never to be taken seriously? But they are, my friend. Nothing happens by "chance" (which is an incredibly ambiguous word). Nothing!
What is my point: does everyone drink? Do girls expect to back up on the guy they dance with? I ask these questions out of curiosity alone. Trust me, I've been through all of that stuff. The fact that a knife is devoid of crimson shadows does not make it innocent of murder. I've done all these things. And now, I'm ignorant once again, so tell me, does everyone drink?
What is my point: does everyone drink? Do girls expect to back up on the guy they dance with? I ask these questions out of curiosity alone. Trust me, I've been through all of that stuff. The fact that a knife is devoid of crimson shadows does not make it innocent of murder. I've done all these things. And now, I'm ignorant once again, so tell me, does everyone drink?
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Question of the Day?
So how do I know when to sleep? When my eyes begin to tire? If so, then I should sleep a lot during the day, including study time. When I think I'm going to get about 7 hrs of sleep? But researchers keep changing their reports. When I feel I've accomplished enough for the day? I'm sort of an overachiever sometimes, so that can be a problem.
I don't know. I do know I'm going to bed now. I have an interesting day ahead.
A man that flattereth his neighbor spreadeth a net for his feet
I don't know. I do know I'm going to bed now. I have an interesting day ahead.
A man that flattereth his neighbor spreadeth a net for his feet
Monday, January 21, 2008
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Illuminations from the article "The World of Epictetus"
Andy Dufresne, one of the protagonists in the movie, Shawshank Redemption, was sexually assaulted continually by a troika of men, who referred to themselves as "The Sisters." Every time they cornered him in a room, he fought back. Time after time, he was violated, but he never stopped looking around for some sort of weapon to protect himself with. Several years later, the aggressive actions towards Andy stopped because of his newly formed relationship with the prison warder. "The Sisters" were punished in a manner that was sure to be confined and would find a way to display itself in everything they would ever do for the rest of their natural lives. Andy was one of the lucky ones in this recurring theme of "prison rape." Or was he really? Is there a reward for his determination since only very few people would struggle so consistently, knowing that there was a very slim chance of victory. I pose a Darwinian question:(by the way, I must state that I believe in the creationism of the Christian Bible and not evolution), "Would natural selection favor these strong few or would they, acting in the capacity of societal mutants, be diluted out of the environment?"
What did Andy fight for? I believe that the foreword by OS Guinness in "The World of Epictetus" is a precise analogy to the Shawshank story. Andy Dufresne fought for his integrity. I believe he did ask himself the personal question, "Who am I?" as opposed to societally influenced alternative "How will I be seen?" I am convinced that he answered the question himself, and stuck to it, like a reflection sticks to a mirror.
He asked himself the question: "Who am I?"
Who are you?
What did Andy fight for? I believe that the foreword by OS Guinness in "The World of Epictetus" is a precise analogy to the Shawshank story. Andy Dufresne fought for his integrity. I believe he did ask himself the personal question, "Who am I?" as opposed to societally influenced alternative "How will I be seen?" I am convinced that he answered the question himself, and stuck to it, like a reflection sticks to a mirror.
He asked himself the question: "Who am I?"
Who are you?
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
In Answer to the Eureka Phenomenon by Issac Asminov
Question 1
Does Asimov argue that science ought to abandon reasoned thought in favor of intuition?
No, I do not believe his argument is that there is no need for reasoned thought. I think instead this is what he believes:
Imagine the rigorous thought process as a group of slave workers who are digging in search of the tomb of a long lost king. They totally uncover the tomb, but they see mysteries that they cannot decipher, and then the archaeologist comes in, and he opens the tomb.
He does not refute the importance of thought, but he does believe that intuition, as is used in the question, is responsible for more discoveries than the doctrine of science presumes. (See page 207, paragraph 4)
2
What does Asimov find wrong about scientific reports as they are customarily written? Do you agree? If scientific writing were not strictly reasonable, wouldn't there be a danger of misrepresenting science?
He is disappointed that very few scientific reports include that “Eureka phenomenon” he believes is responsible for a majority of the accomplishments and discoveries that scientists make. Poincare makes a similar, albeit converse, argument which is quite sensible; it must since his thoughts on the matter are acclaimed as one of the most important articles ever written on creativity. Poincare explains the circumstances behind the completion of his Fuscher function theorem: where “ideas collided until the pairs interlocked” involuntarily after he had mentally exerted himself seemingly to no avail. Then, he had to work out that inspired thought, which he agreed had become considerably less difficult, before he had any considerable success.
I believe that contemporary science reports are boring and lack imagination. I also believe that very few extraordinary discoveries can be made by extreme mental exertion, because I do not believe that man even understands the mind enough to control it. I agree that the amount of work put into a research should be penned down and the researcher deserves credit for his industriousness; but I believe it is ingenuity and genius for a thought to unconsciously reveal itself to a person. I believe that science is afraid of the unknown, and the relation this may have to the supernatural.
To the last section of the question, I ask “what is science?” In my opinion, science should be the act of finding out, irrespective of the repercussions that this may have on the dogmatic beliefs of the intellectual caucus. I don’t believe that science should be afraid of being misinterpreted because it is an indefinite, widely encompassing and largely unknown area which must be open to foray by any and all means possible, as long as those means are morally proper. Again, the definition of moral can become largely ambiguous, so I define it in terms of the two greatest laws on earth: “Thou shall love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, soul and mind” and “Thou shall love thy neighbor as thyself.”
3
Is cultivation of the "Eureka phenomenon" encouraged in any of he science courses you may have taken or are now taking? Why, or why not?
I honestly do not believe there is a definite answer to that question, because the school system seems to be designed to teach students how to teach themselves, through a process of the school teaching the students. This is almost a rigmarole method, which is sometimes unnecessary, judging by the success of college drop-outs like Bill Gates, the Steves: Jobs and Wozniak, Ted Turner and many others. Also, the teaching process is dependent on the professor, and I do not believe any of my Science classes this year necessarily advocate the cultivation of the “Eureka phenomenon.” Then again, I believe it is the discretion of the student to apply his knowledge outside of the classroom in constructive and unique ways, (maybe by joining a research) , in order for the mentioned phenomenon to be put to the test.
4
Have you ever experienced anything like the "Eureka phenomenon" Asimov describes? If so, write out an account of what happened. Tell us what your feelings were when the phenomenon occurred. Did you ever report the discovery in just that way to any one else?
The “Eureka phenomenon” has definitely occurred countless times in my life. It can come from the influence of certain types of music, or it may be from a particular scene from a movie. Or it may just be from reading my Bible and talking with God. It is my belief that all these things are still tied, in some inexplicable way, to my conversations with God, and they are merely an offshoot of those divine moments.
I have not necessarily reported them to anyone in particular. I engage in ordinary conversations with random people, conversations that mostly turn deep, when I confess my testimony of God and my faith.
Does Asimov argue that science ought to abandon reasoned thought in favor of intuition?
No, I do not believe his argument is that there is no need for reasoned thought. I think instead this is what he believes:
Imagine the rigorous thought process as a group of slave workers who are digging in search of the tomb of a long lost king. They totally uncover the tomb, but they see mysteries that they cannot decipher, and then the archaeologist comes in, and he opens the tomb.
He does not refute the importance of thought, but he does believe that intuition, as is used in the question, is responsible for more discoveries than the doctrine of science presumes. (See page 207, paragraph 4)
2
What does Asimov find wrong about scientific reports as they are customarily written? Do you agree? If scientific writing were not strictly reasonable, wouldn't there be a danger of misrepresenting science?
He is disappointed that very few scientific reports include that “Eureka phenomenon” he believes is responsible for a majority of the accomplishments and discoveries that scientists make. Poincare makes a similar, albeit converse, argument which is quite sensible; it must since his thoughts on the matter are acclaimed as one of the most important articles ever written on creativity. Poincare explains the circumstances behind the completion of his Fuscher function theorem: where “ideas collided until the pairs interlocked” involuntarily after he had mentally exerted himself seemingly to no avail. Then, he had to work out that inspired thought, which he agreed had become considerably less difficult, before he had any considerable success.
I believe that contemporary science reports are boring and lack imagination. I also believe that very few extraordinary discoveries can be made by extreme mental exertion, because I do not believe that man even understands the mind enough to control it. I agree that the amount of work put into a research should be penned down and the researcher deserves credit for his industriousness; but I believe it is ingenuity and genius for a thought to unconsciously reveal itself to a person. I believe that science is afraid of the unknown, and the relation this may have to the supernatural.
To the last section of the question, I ask “what is science?” In my opinion, science should be the act of finding out, irrespective of the repercussions that this may have on the dogmatic beliefs of the intellectual caucus. I don’t believe that science should be afraid of being misinterpreted because it is an indefinite, widely encompassing and largely unknown area which must be open to foray by any and all means possible, as long as those means are morally proper. Again, the definition of moral can become largely ambiguous, so I define it in terms of the two greatest laws on earth: “Thou shall love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, soul and mind” and “Thou shall love thy neighbor as thyself.”
3
Is cultivation of the "Eureka phenomenon" encouraged in any of he science courses you may have taken or are now taking? Why, or why not?
I honestly do not believe there is a definite answer to that question, because the school system seems to be designed to teach students how to teach themselves, through a process of the school teaching the students. This is almost a rigmarole method, which is sometimes unnecessary, judging by the success of college drop-outs like Bill Gates, the Steves: Jobs and Wozniak, Ted Turner and many others. Also, the teaching process is dependent on the professor, and I do not believe any of my Science classes this year necessarily advocate the cultivation of the “Eureka phenomenon.” Then again, I believe it is the discretion of the student to apply his knowledge outside of the classroom in constructive and unique ways, (maybe by joining a research) , in order for the mentioned phenomenon to be put to the test.
4
Have you ever experienced anything like the "Eureka phenomenon" Asimov describes? If so, write out an account of what happened. Tell us what your feelings were when the phenomenon occurred. Did you ever report the discovery in just that way to any one else?
The “Eureka phenomenon” has definitely occurred countless times in my life. It can come from the influence of certain types of music, or it may be from a particular scene from a movie. Or it may just be from reading my Bible and talking with God. It is my belief that all these things are still tied, in some inexplicable way, to my conversations with God, and they are merely an offshoot of those divine moments.
I have not necessarily reported them to anyone in particular. I engage in ordinary conversations with random people, conversations that mostly turn deep, when I confess my testimony of God and my faith.
What is Your Testimony?
So, some really remarkable things have happened in my comparatively short life. When I look back at the things God has allowed me to be a part of, it still blows me away.
A few years ago, back home in Nigeria, I was washing one of the cars, I think it was the Infiniti. The winds were blowing wildly, and I knew it would rain. All of a sudden, something "came over me" in the figurative sense, and I asked God to hold back the rain. Then, I said, rather randomly and for no real reason, except that God may have the glory: "If I have found favor in Your eyes, cause these winds to cease." It was not five seconds after I said that before everything became calm, and the wind held its silence for about ten seconds. I was astonished and shocked, because I honestly could not comprehend it. At that moment when I asked, I had an incredible amount of faith, but when it actually happened, it blew me away, in a manner of speaking. It didn't rain that entire day either.
Earlier even than that, I was a foul mouthed boy of about fifteen or sixteen, and I could not walk the distance of an entire sentence without cussing. I made a pact with God, with my ignorant, unsaved heart, that if I was chosen to represent Nigeria in an International Biology Olympiad, I would stop cussing. I was chosen, and I honestly cannot remember how I stopped it, but I did. During that trip, I had a persistent cyst on my wrist. Annoying little bugger it was. A self-conscious lad like myself surely did not want to be carrying such a monstrosity in the middle of my then paper-thick wrist. Come on, then I was quite the "ladies boy". That was probably my goal in life: "continue to be THE ladies man." So, I was introduced into the world of big "cover the cyst" watches. Anyways, I arrived at the venue of the competition for the IBO, and for some reason, I kept praying to God to take away the cyst. Aah, the longing soul. I don't know what my level of faith was, I only know I prayed every day in the manner that I knew how to (going to church turned out to be a good thing after all). Every morning, I would raise the black NBA wristband, which has vanished from my "little" scope of existence (it would have made an incredible memorabilia for the generations of Onyewuchis after me), to see if the cyst was there. True to the nature of a cyst, it rolled its eyes at me every morning as I poked it in the bones (no pun intended). None taken? Aah, that is bad. Anyways, one morning, I woke up, took a shower, and goofed around. I had already been selected on the four man team to represent Nigeria in Brisbane, Australia. Yaay. No cussing for me, but I go ahead of myself (I was not to know that quite yet, you see). Taking a communal shower in a boarding school, albeit a massively expensive one (oil collar workers, senators, ministers, governors, and even ex-presidents had their kids there) was not exactly in my ideal Adesoye College (which by the way is the name of the school) plan (see, I just graduated from a private school). Are you getting this? Anyways, I took a shower and emerged a "new?" man, sans a lot of things which I would rather not elaborate on. I dressed up, goofed around, and came back to the dorm late at night from frolicking around the college. I was about to go to bed when I remembered that I had not performed my ritual of "peek-a-boo, I can see you" with Fräulein Cyst. So, I peeked and I poked, and I received one of the greatest boos of my life: my annoying, pestering, persistent, habit was over. Because, you see, my wrist was not a place of habitation anymore. The cyst had been "exorcised." My father thought I had performed a surgery on it without telling him. Are you kidding me? Stick a knife in, and gorge did not sound very appealing to me!! True story.
I have one more fantastic story to tell you. Maybe later. You see, there is no turning back for me at this stage. God has made an investment in me too strong to crash, they lie way way deeper than the foundations of the Twin Towers (God comfort the families and rest the souls of those who died on that sad day). These things are the seemingly major chips from the chunks that God has hewed off of me to build me up in Him. I could and I probably will tell you of the less astronomically incredible things God has done in my life. Believe me, they all make me wonder. I don't quite believe in luck or coincidences (from my own perspective and understanding of the world). Maybe it's all part of my "little" scope.
But this I know:
I WILL TELL THE WORLD THAT JESUS LIVES.
Be modest about your testimony and hide the glory of God in the darkness if you dare!!
A few years ago, back home in Nigeria, I was washing one of the cars, I think it was the Infiniti. The winds were blowing wildly, and I knew it would rain. All of a sudden, something "came over me" in the figurative sense, and I asked God to hold back the rain. Then, I said, rather randomly and for no real reason, except that God may have the glory: "If I have found favor in Your eyes, cause these winds to cease." It was not five seconds after I said that before everything became calm, and the wind held its silence for about ten seconds. I was astonished and shocked, because I honestly could not comprehend it. At that moment when I asked, I had an incredible amount of faith, but when it actually happened, it blew me away, in a manner of speaking. It didn't rain that entire day either.
Earlier even than that, I was a foul mouthed boy of about fifteen or sixteen, and I could not walk the distance of an entire sentence without cussing. I made a pact with God, with my ignorant, unsaved heart, that if I was chosen to represent Nigeria in an International Biology Olympiad, I would stop cussing. I was chosen, and I honestly cannot remember how I stopped it, but I did. During that trip, I had a persistent cyst on my wrist. Annoying little bugger it was. A self-conscious lad like myself surely did not want to be carrying such a monstrosity in the middle of my then paper-thick wrist. Come on, then I was quite the "ladies boy". That was probably my goal in life: "continue to be THE ladies man." So, I was introduced into the world of big "cover the cyst" watches. Anyways, I arrived at the venue of the competition for the IBO, and for some reason, I kept praying to God to take away the cyst. Aah, the longing soul. I don't know what my level of faith was, I only know I prayed every day in the manner that I knew how to (going to church turned out to be a good thing after all). Every morning, I would raise the black NBA wristband, which has vanished from my "little" scope of existence (it would have made an incredible memorabilia for the generations of Onyewuchis after me), to see if the cyst was there. True to the nature of a cyst, it rolled its eyes at me every morning as I poked it in the bones (no pun intended). None taken? Aah, that is bad. Anyways, one morning, I woke up, took a shower, and goofed around. I had already been selected on the four man team to represent Nigeria in Brisbane, Australia. Yaay. No cussing for me, but I go ahead of myself (I was not to know that quite yet, you see). Taking a communal shower in a boarding school, albeit a massively expensive one (oil collar workers, senators, ministers, governors, and even ex-presidents had their kids there) was not exactly in my ideal Adesoye College (which by the way is the name of the school) plan (see, I just graduated from a private school). Are you getting this? Anyways, I took a shower and emerged a "new?" man, sans a lot of things which I would rather not elaborate on. I dressed up, goofed around, and came back to the dorm late at night from frolicking around the college. I was about to go to bed when I remembered that I had not performed my ritual of "peek-a-boo, I can see you" with Fräulein Cyst. So, I peeked and I poked, and I received one of the greatest boos of my life: my annoying, pestering, persistent, habit was over. Because, you see, my wrist was not a place of habitation anymore. The cyst had been "exorcised." My father thought I had performed a surgery on it without telling him. Are you kidding me? Stick a knife in, and gorge did not sound very appealing to me!! True story.
I have one more fantastic story to tell you. Maybe later. You see, there is no turning back for me at this stage. God has made an investment in me too strong to crash, they lie way way deeper than the foundations of the Twin Towers (God comfort the families and rest the souls of those who died on that sad day). These things are the seemingly major chips from the chunks that God has hewed off of me to build me up in Him. I could and I probably will tell you of the less astronomically incredible things God has done in my life. Believe me, they all make me wonder. I don't quite believe in luck or coincidences (from my own perspective and understanding of the world). Maybe it's all part of my "little" scope.
But this I know:
I WILL TELL THE WORLD THAT JESUS LIVES.
Be modest about your testimony and hide the glory of God in the darkness if you dare!!
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
More of God
"The full soul loatheth an honeycomb; but to the hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet."
The full soul...The hungry soul...The content soul...The longing soul...the soul...
Isn't it really neat how we see ourselves oscillate from one end of this pendulum to the other? It's not like the body, where a consistent workout spanning a long period of time almost seems to make the body conform to the "worked out" structure, even after the individual stops frequenting the gym. Our soul breaks down if it is not constantly being tended to. It almost seems like a 40 year old child that never leaves his mother's basement. It is grown and "mature", but it still needs constant love and attention.
I remember the days when "I" was making extraordinary forays into the spiritual, when God lead me everywhere I went and I was conscious of it. When I went to bed because He said it was OK to, I stayed up and prayed because I needed to (and I wanted to), I cried because His presence was too much for me to comprehend. Now, I read my Bible and go to class. I need an adventure. China maybe? I don't think so. NYSUM...I need an adventure. Maybe that's why I haven't written my book in a while, I do not feel the adventure as much as I should.
Maybe it's from not reading the "red letters" of Jesus and from confining myself to the wisdom of Proverbs. But, I don't really think so. I don't know. Oh yes, I do.
I know all things through Christ who strengthens me. I am not in despair. I just want more of God, can you see?
The full soul...The hungry soul...The content soul...The longing soul...the soul...
Isn't it really neat how we see ourselves oscillate from one end of this pendulum to the other? It's not like the body, where a consistent workout spanning a long period of time almost seems to make the body conform to the "worked out" structure, even after the individual stops frequenting the gym. Our soul breaks down if it is not constantly being tended to. It almost seems like a 40 year old child that never leaves his mother's basement. It is grown and "mature", but it still needs constant love and attention.
I remember the days when "I" was making extraordinary forays into the spiritual, when God lead me everywhere I went and I was conscious of it. When I went to bed because He said it was OK to, I stayed up and prayed because I needed to (and I wanted to), I cried because His presence was too much for me to comprehend. Now, I read my Bible and go to class. I need an adventure. China maybe? I don't think so. NYSUM...I need an adventure. Maybe that's why I haven't written my book in a while, I do not feel the adventure as much as I should.
Maybe it's from not reading the "red letters" of Jesus and from confining myself to the wisdom of Proverbs. But, I don't really think so. I don't know. Oh yes, I do.
I know all things through Christ who strengthens me. I am not in despair. I just want more of God, can you see?
Monday, January 14, 2008
And now, who is Henri Poincaré? I confess, I do this also for myself, to remind myself of these men.
Question of the Day
Question of the Day: Who is J.J.Abrams? And by that, I mean who is the J.J.Abrams that I am thinking about at this moment? I don't care about J.J., your roommate or something.
Another question to think about is why am I asking who J.J.Abrams is? I know "who" he is and I most definitely don't gain anything if you mimic the answer I already have. So why am I asking it then? What point am I trying to make? That is for me to know and for you to find out. If you want to. So, you tell me.
Another question to think about is why am I asking who J.J.Abrams is? I know "who" he is and I most definitely don't gain anything if you mimic the answer I already have. So why am I asking it then? What point am I trying to make? That is for me to know and for you to find out. If you want to. So, you tell me.
Hahaha
I laugh because I can. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, not because I'm tall or lean, but because I'm made in the image of God. Do you even know what that means? Do you have any idea what is inside of you and tearing at your heart because you refuse to let it emerge on its own? Why do you allow "modesty" to hold back your God given talents? Why are Christians more depressed than a lot of other people? Why do people think Christianity is no fun? I'm sorry because if these people are right, I am no Christian. That is saying a lot, because I base my entire life on the fact that I am the image bearer of Christ, so I had better not be wrong. Hmm...let me see, I'm taking care not to take the Bible out of context, but it does talk about a peace which surpasses all understanding. I think the issue is with the heart. Doesn't the Bible also say, "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he?"
The scripture:
"You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures"
reinforces the issue with setting one's heart right before God. How do you do this? Yo, it's late and I do have an early class tomorrow, but hey, you know what? Ask GOD!!! Just lay back, or kneel, or do whatever you're most comfortable with, remembering that He is the Lord of all (He made the heavens and the earth), and just speak out loud believing that He is there to answer you. Don't worry if you don't get an audible voice (I haven't gotten one of those yet, I'm still hoping, terrified that it is going to happen, but still hoping).
Ask God. Then, you'll probably understand why I laugh so much. And why I have so much fun with life.
Good night kids. Say hey to my roommates for me, will ya?
Be on the lookout for my book, "War of the Worlds." Haven't finished it yet because maybe you're supposed to pray about it driving the right message into the hearts of men, so yeah, pray for me about it. Yeah. Here's to you oh lovely reader you:
Wonderful Savior
My heart belongs to Thee
I will remember always the blood You shed for me
Wonderful Savior
My heart will know Your worth
So I will embrace You always as I walk this earth
Chorus:
Be blessed, be loved, be lifted high
Be treasured here
Be glorified
I owe my life to You my Lord
Here I am....
Beautiful Jesus
How may I bless Your heart?
Knees to the earth I bow down to everything You are
Beautiful Jesus
You are my only worth
So let me embrace You always as I walk this earth
The scripture:
"You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures"
reinforces the issue with setting one's heart right before God. How do you do this? Yo, it's late and I do have an early class tomorrow, but hey, you know what? Ask GOD!!! Just lay back, or kneel, or do whatever you're most comfortable with, remembering that He is the Lord of all (He made the heavens and the earth), and just speak out loud believing that He is there to answer you. Don't worry if you don't get an audible voice (I haven't gotten one of those yet, I'm still hoping, terrified that it is going to happen, but still hoping).
Ask God. Then, you'll probably understand why I laugh so much. And why I have so much fun with life.
Good night kids. Say hey to my roommates for me, will ya?
Be on the lookout for my book, "War of the Worlds." Haven't finished it yet because maybe you're supposed to pray about it driving the right message into the hearts of men, so yeah, pray for me about it. Yeah. Here's to you oh lovely reader you:
Wonderful Savior
My heart belongs to Thee
I will remember always the blood You shed for me
Wonderful Savior
My heart will know Your worth
So I will embrace You always as I walk this earth
Chorus:
Be blessed, be loved, be lifted high
Be treasured here
Be glorified
I owe my life to You my Lord
Here I am....
Beautiful Jesus
How may I bless Your heart?
Knees to the earth I bow down to everything You are
Beautiful Jesus
You are my only worth
So let me embrace You always as I walk this earth
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Make Sense Of It
What am I concerned with? What makes me tick? What drives me on? What makes me complete that last pushup when my body tells me I'm done? What makes me stay up later than a lot of other people: thinking, writing, reading, praying, asking?
Fear makes me hesitate a lot of times, but I hardly cower in the corner, Not any more. Modesty, more than anything, makes me back down from certain "opportunities." I look back and I remember it was not this way before. So, the question comes again: what makes me Stan? Who makes me Stan? I know the answer to that question, truly I do and I don't doubt it for one second. My mind cannot possibly comprehend certain things, but I can honestly answer that question.
The question is what are you concerned with? What makes you tick? What drives you on? What makes you stay up longer than others, or sleep longer, or fight harder? You don't have to tell me, just ponder over it for a bit.
Are you sure you have your answer? Do you doubt it? Do you understand it? If you do, good for you. If you don't, hmm.
Deceive me, but don't deceive yourself. Nothing is more pitiful than a person who tries to deceive his own soul. There is more to this world than meets the eye, less material than the tiniest nanoparticle, yet omnipotent. Can you understand that? I can. I can't.
Urea from a drunken male strikes the snow on the grass outside my window, and it beerly rains. I can. I can't. Can you?
Fear makes me hesitate a lot of times, but I hardly cower in the corner, Not any more. Modesty, more than anything, makes me back down from certain "opportunities." I look back and I remember it was not this way before. So, the question comes again: what makes me Stan? Who makes me Stan? I know the answer to that question, truly I do and I don't doubt it for one second. My mind cannot possibly comprehend certain things, but I can honestly answer that question.
The question is what are you concerned with? What makes you tick? What drives you on? What makes you stay up longer than others, or sleep longer, or fight harder? You don't have to tell me, just ponder over it for a bit.
Are you sure you have your answer? Do you doubt it? Do you understand it? If you do, good for you. If you don't, hmm.
Deceive me, but don't deceive yourself. Nothing is more pitiful than a person who tries to deceive his own soul. There is more to this world than meets the eye, less material than the tiniest nanoparticle, yet omnipotent. Can you understand that? I can. I can't.
Urea from a drunken male strikes the snow on the grass outside my window, and it beerly rains. I can. I can't. Can you?
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Let It Wait
Hmm. Today draws to a close. So it goes. I'm walking around the "crib" like an arthritic old man. I played non-stop basketball for about three hours or so. In my own special way, I unloaded the weight around my thighs, it was refreshing. So, I crawl into bed and try to raise a leg and let out a tiny (i promise it was tiny) howl (okay, how can a howl be tiny right). I really do not know where any of this is going. You see, I slept through two of my classes today, and today is the first day of school. I don't feel older because I hardly think about my age, I always feel older anyways. Sometimes. And also, I have sinned. For some "inexplicable" reason, my guard has not been as high as it "usually is." I don't say this expecting applause or even a show of camaraderie here. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, and so I am not obliged to apologize if anyone thinks I am trying to imply that my guard is usually high, because it is. But for some "inexplicable reason", I don't feel that invulnerability anymore. I would like to say that it is because I have not been reading my Bible or praying, but it isn't. I need more of God. We all need more of God. My apartment mate, Jedediah Burke asked me, "What do you think can happen to make you so afraid that you run away when your friends need you?
This question did not come as a act of machismo (we were watching Rambo, you see); it was a deep question which we shared deeply. Deep and wide, deep and wide, there's a fountain flowing deep and waaiiiiiddde. Forgive my childish rambling.
The answer is: I don't know. Ask me and I honestly cannot think of anything really. But, I know there is something, and the only way I can face "that vague something" is by a "supernatural" strength. And my "supernatural" strength comes from Jesus.
And so, I look at my low guard, and my mediocre attempts to get it back up, and I know what the problem is. I need to wrestle with the Master, I need a fresh encounter. God, You are definitely reading this (reading is a funny way to put it, I can probably do better, but I'll be speaking Stanlish, so let's forget it for the moment), so hear me:
I WANT AN ENCOUNTER WITH YOU!!
Good night kids. Do play safe. Lights out, and I'm into the darkness, and the darkness flees, because:
I like the picture of this kid:
http://www.lightoftheworldcharities.com/
A friend of mine showed my this quote:
No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it
Hah. Why would the dark be waiting for the light, I wonder? The darkness can only survive when the light is gone. Think about today's modern world. How many times do we stay in complete darkness? We need light and we turn on the light switch, what does the darkness do about it? Free will. Our call. Well, if it is waiting, let it wait I say, let it wait...
“We are the Light of the World.”
“Let our light shine before all, that they may see the good
that we do and give glory to God.”
(Matthew 5:16)
This question did not come as a act of machismo (we were watching Rambo, you see); it was a deep question which we shared deeply. Deep and wide, deep and wide, there's a fountain flowing deep and waaiiiiiddde. Forgive my childish rambling.
The answer is: I don't know. Ask me and I honestly cannot think of anything really. But, I know there is something, and the only way I can face "that vague something" is by a "supernatural" strength. And my "supernatural" strength comes from Jesus.
And so, I look at my low guard, and my mediocre attempts to get it back up, and I know what the problem is. I need to wrestle with the Master, I need a fresh encounter. God, You are definitely reading this (reading is a funny way to put it, I can probably do better, but I'll be speaking Stanlish, so let's forget it for the moment), so hear me:
I WANT AN ENCOUNTER WITH YOU!!
Good night kids. Do play safe. Lights out, and I'm into the darkness, and the darkness flees, because:
I like the picture of this kid:
http://www.lightoftheworldcharities.com/
A friend of mine showed my this quote:
No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it
Hah. Why would the dark be waiting for the light, I wonder? The darkness can only survive when the light is gone. Think about today's modern world. How many times do we stay in complete darkness? We need light and we turn on the light switch, what does the darkness do about it? Free will. Our call. Well, if it is waiting, let it wait I say, let it wait...
“We are the Light of the World.”
“Let our light shine before all, that they may see the good
that we do and give glory to God.”
(Matthew 5:16)
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Crackly Speakers
hmm. for like a week now, my speakers have been acting up, but now they aren't anymore. interesting. doesn't say much for dell though. that's for sure.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
slept at around 4 or 5ish am and woke up at 11. not too bad i suppose. cell group today was awesome! had an encounter with God about the gifts of the Spirit, specifically the gift of healing. it's funny how God visits us "more frequently" these days because we are more receptive of His presence. funny how i use the pronoun "us" when i've been here for just a year. funny really. a lot of things are funny. i'm sure God is funny, why else do i laugh so much? i surely can't be krazy, well let's not go there. no, let's not.
i feel if you are reading this particular post, there is a reason. may God open your heart to receive His voice. amen.
and so it goes.
i feel if you are reading this particular post, there is a reason. may God open your heart to receive His voice. amen.
and so it goes.
Monday, January 7, 2008
hmm
why do people have the urge to go on facebook so much? why should we want to know what goes on around us every five minutes? what can possibly happen in five minutes? a lot, and still nothing. well, one thing is for sure, mark zuckerburg is definitely enjoying it. that's for sure.
what makes a man? aah, to stand up for what you believe in, no matter the circumstance...to step in front of a bullet knowing that there are two options:
1: the bullet takes you down and you die for what you believe in
2: the bullet misses and you are left standing
either way, you win. it doesn't really matter what happens next. you win. just make sure you know what you are fighting for.
innocence is dead?
what makes a man? aah, to stand up for what you believe in, no matter the circumstance...to step in front of a bullet knowing that there are two options:
1: the bullet takes you down and you die for what you believe in
2: the bullet misses and you are left standing
either way, you win. it doesn't really matter what happens next. you win. just make sure you know what you are fighting for.
innocence is dead?
hmm
things get interesting. i always like a good adventure. i smell treachery, and i am not aboard a pirate ship, not yet. my eyelid twitcheth on, and i wonder.
God puts passions into our hearts, and only by surrendering all to Him do we ever really tap into those desires and act them out. Tricky some would say; unfathomable wisdom is what I call it, unfathomable. God, thank you because things are interesting. And interesting has always interested me. I always like a good adventure. Ah, passions.
a man's Bible should never be beyond the reach of his hand.
Matthew 6:25-27 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
God puts passions into our hearts, and only by surrendering all to Him do we ever really tap into those desires and act them out. Tricky some would say; unfathomable wisdom is what I call it, unfathomable. God, thank you because things are interesting. And interesting has always interested me. I always like a good adventure. Ah, passions.
a man's Bible should never be beyond the reach of his hand.
Matthew 6:25-27 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
Saturday, January 5, 2008
hmm
why do we have passions? why do we ask questions? why do we forget? why do we forget God? i don't know what else to say, i don't have some fancy wordplay to awe anyone with today. but why has this generation forgotten God? why do we play Christians, even within the deepest caucus of the "church body"? why do we say one thing and mean another? why can't we all get along like we should? why do we lust, why do we beat down our brothers, why do we say things in dark places that we wouldn't in the light? why do we have to take a shower in the morning? why?
life is so random and i love to talk when i feel a good talk coming on. other times, silence is such sweet reprieve. i'm about to ramble and speak darkly so i should probably stop.
today is gone, and yet it just started. it was interesting, and yet so very dull. long, and short at the same time.
oh, i love kids
and i wonder do i cheer for the Celtics cos they're the winning team?
life is so random and i love to talk when i feel a good talk coming on. other times, silence is such sweet reprieve. i'm about to ramble and speak darkly so i should probably stop.
today is gone, and yet it just started. it was interesting, and yet so very dull. long, and short at the same time.
oh, i love kids
and i wonder do i cheer for the Celtics cos they're the winning team?
Friday, January 4, 2008
all good things
all good things come to those who wait, i hear. how trite huh? i agree. but still, when i lose things, they always find a way back home. like my Dominica bracelet for example, it's right here beside me on the bed. isn't that just beautiful? almost makes you want to cry.
God woke me up today. What about yesterday? you ask. Yeah, he did that too. What about the day before? Yep. So, why is today special? I never said it was. I just said God woke me up today and that is all you can make me say. The rest is history, my friends.
God with us, so close to us
God with us, Emmanuel
God woke me up today. What about yesterday? you ask. Yeah, he did that too. What about the day before? Yep. So, why is today special? I never said it was. I just said God woke me up today and that is all you can make me say. The rest is history, my friends.
God with us, so close to us
God with us, Emmanuel
Thursday, January 3, 2008
weird
weird. i looked in d mirror and i seemed darker. n i liked it. isnt that even weirder.
oh my. i wonder y...oh yes...oh no...oh my word...yes, i love God...no, I don't like u...yes, i'd rather not use ellipsis...yes, i have my own language...no, i am not always like this...like what? like this...can't you see? bored yet? me? never. silent maybe..ok, yes i get bored. but i always make it up in my krazy moments...
did u know kool is the exact converse for look? im like tht..i see these things and no i dont think i have synesthesia...i write poems in d middle of movies n songs n conversations though.
ahh, thtz my daily spilgz. God is awesome.
Go krazy---i like it
oh my. i wonder y...oh yes...oh no...oh my word...yes, i love God...no, I don't like u...yes, i'd rather not use ellipsis...yes, i have my own language...no, i am not always like this...like what? like this...can't you see? bored yet? me? never. silent maybe..ok, yes i get bored. but i always make it up in my krazy moments...
did u know kool is the exact converse for look? im like tht..i see these things and no i dont think i have synesthesia...i write poems in d middle of movies n songs n conversations though.
ahh, thtz my daily spilgz. God is awesome.
Go krazy---i like it
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
HOPE...God likes it
Ok, for real, I'm gonna get tired of this unless someone tells me why God is so awesome!! It's mind blowingly insane how "everything always works out", and I don't mean that things always happen the way we expect them to. It really is difficult to fathom WHY God will decide to be in charge of everything in our lives; but then we realize that it isn't us that he sees: Oh oh, this isn't some kind of news flash guys, really, God sees Jesus. And that is remarkable because it does not matter what you look like or what you smell like (hah) or even what you are doing for God at that point, because it is not you, but the Spirit of God that lives through you that does them, it is beautiful in God's eyes.
Do not fret beautiful ones (don't look around, yeah, I mean you), the reward is not being the most popular or the funniest or the danciest or the smartest, it is in allowing Jesus take over more of your life, it's in being the apple of God's eyes.
Ok, so I'm writing this book yeah, about something similar to this, I'll let you know when it is finally done. Before then, God bless and have an extraordinary new year.
HOPE...God likes it
Do not fret beautiful ones (don't look around, yeah, I mean you), the reward is not being the most popular or the funniest or the danciest or the smartest, it is in allowing Jesus take over more of your life, it's in being the apple of God's eyes.
Ok, so I'm writing this book yeah, about something similar to this, I'll let you know when it is finally done. Before then, God bless and have an extraordinary new year.
HOPE...God likes it
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